Pain in the neck!

This is my neck after doing 125# back squats today.  I sent this picture to my coaches and they said I'm holding the bar too high and that I need to keep the bar lower.....basically on top of my traps.  Whatever traps are.  Derek said he'd show me tomorrow how to fix my form.  In the mean time I am freaking SORE!  Not only from all the back squats, which by the way was a 40 lb PR for me!  Woot woot!  I did 5 sets of 5 at 125 lbs.  That's a huge increase from what I have been doing. 

We also did FRAN yesterday.  I used 20 lbs more on my bar and boy oh boy did I feel it!  I woke up several times last night because every time I moved my muscles I would be in quite a bit of pain.  I'm taking today off completely to rest and recover.  Maybe I'll get a jump start on Thanksgiving preparations. 

Do you feel like because your body doesn't look the way you want that it holds you back from life?  I let how I feel about myself dictate just about every facet of my life.  I hate that!  I really wanted to wear a dress for the holidays but I feel like I'll look like a whale so I won't. In fact, because I still hate how my body looks I won't even go buy a new outfit.  I can't stand the thought of spending money on clothes that are huge.  I don't know how to love myself where I currently am and that really bothers me.  How does a person change that?