Monday, December 30, 2013

1 week till Paleo Challenge kick off

I'm super excited for this coming Paleo challenge at our Crossfit.  It starts Jan. 6th and runs for 6 weeks.  This time it costs $40.  There will be two winners, 1 male, and 1 female.  They will split the moola.  The smount of money you can win, will completely depend upon how many people sign up.  I gave my $40 to Meagan this morning and officially signed up.  I was also the very first one to sign up....that's a good sign, right?  I fully plan on winning this thing!  I have the most fat to lose (female wise) in the gym, so I think that gives me a bit of an advantage.  I hope! 

I made it to the gym today and got my behind handed to me on a silver platter....or should I say, my arms?!  My arms felt like jelly afterwards and still feel quite weak and sore.  I didn't realize that I PR'd my back squat today.  115 lbs.  Still not a great number, but I was happy with it. 

Not much else to report.  I'm glad Christmas is over.  It was stressful and frustrating.  I'm just ready to get 2014 started. 

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Every victory is a Non Scale Victory!!!!!

After throwing away my scale last spring...I must say that it's a decision I don't regret in the least.  I love reading fitness and weight loss blogs, but I swear most of them center around what the flipping scale says or doesn't say.  I let my scale wreck havoc on my life since I was in 5th grade.....almost 25 years! 

Since joining crossfit I've met some AMAZING people.  There are a couple girls that are tiny.  They are extremely muscular but all in all, very small....and they weigh WAY more than you'd ever think.  The scale doesn't show body composition, it doesn't show muscle mass, it doesn't show how your endurance and stamina have increased.....it shows nothing except a number. 

It's so fun to see small victories without even blinking an eye about what the scale might say.  I get true joy when I set a personal record while doing a lift, or doing 18'' box jumps for the first time, or going on a run and not feeling as fatigued as I would've a month earlier.  I love it!  I wish all of us would throw our scales away and just work hard.  We all know that if we eat better and get more exercise we'll lose weight and get fit......so why do we need a scale to tell us something we already know?  I read a blog not too long ago where the gal was frustrated that she weighed 125 lbs and couldn't get back to 122 lbs....which is where she wants to be.  Ummmmm......SERIOUSLY?!    Do you look good in your clothes?  Do you feel good about yourself?  Are you making good choices?  Then freaking WHO CARES what the scales says?  Good grief! 

The other thing is I swear all scales weigh slightly differently.  I remember weighing myself on my bathroom scale, then on my basement scale only to find an 8 lb difference.  Needless to say I convinced myself that I was the weight that was the lesser of the two evils. 

If you are one of those people who obsess about the scale, give yourself a gift this coming year.  Take a break from it.  Put it in the closet for a month or better yet, throw the darn thing away.  Like anything it's hard at first, but soon you'll feel free of it's shackles....and that my friend is worth it's "weight" in gold. 

By the way.....I bought myself a new kettlebell!  The 15 lb bell was no longer much of a challenge and when I workout at home I needed something to help me keep getting stronger.  Meet my 30 lb bell.  Ahhhh, isn't she pretty!    I love her already!

Monday, December 9, 2013

Where has the energy gone?

I haven't felt much "pep" lately.  Where'd it go?!  I'm not sure if it's the crummy sleep I'm getting, the dark winter days, the single digit temps or what.  I miss the full of life feeling I had during the summer. 

My mom called me today to let me know they had to put their dog down.  Jamaica was almost 14 years old.  I clearly remember the first day they brought her home.  She was an 8 week old black lab and my mom brought her down into my room and let her wake me up by licking me.  I feel bad for my parents, they are taking her death very hard.  =( 

I did make it to crossfit.  I really wanted to skip it today though.....it was mostly cardio.  I'd much rather lift weights that do cardio.  Cardio is great for skinny mini's....not for chunky monkey's like myself.  I suppose I need it the most though...since it's a great fat burner.  WHATEVER........I still freaking hate it. 

We rowed 1000 meters, did 40 jumping pull ups, and then had to burn 65 calories on the airdyne bike.  BARF BARF BARF! 

I finished in 15 min 7 seconds.  Definitely one of the slowest times of the day.  Drat! 

I'm going to brew myself up a cup of coffee and then maybe soak in a hot bubble bath.  My let muscles are screaming at me. 

Friday, December 6, 2013

LOVING ME SOME DEADLIFTS!

Life gets so hectic around the holidays!!  I don't know how people keep up with it all.  I feel like I start to fall behind around Thanksgiving and by the New Year I'm ready to throw in the towel. 

I made it into crossfit the day after Thanksgiving.  I felt extremely swollen due to all the salt I consumed.  I had just one plate of food, and really just normal/proper amounts of everything.  Potatoes, stuffing, green bean casserole, turkey, gravy and some cranberry sauce.  Nothing too extreme.  Still the next day my joints hurt and my fingers and toes felt stiff.  I was glad I got right back on the horse the day after the holiday.  I was also proud that I only had about 6 bites of pie that evening.  I used to use holidays as an excuse to not only eat bad food, but to stuff my face for days afterwards.   

By the weekend I started to developed some terrible migraines.  They were so bad that noises, smells, light, just about everything made it almost unbearable.  Because my head hurt so bad I couldn't eat because it would make me feel sick.  I couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't listen to music or watch a movie.  It was all I could do just to make sure my kids got out the door for school and there was food for them to eat.  That has been my existence for most of this week.  I don't know what's causing them.  I'm guessing stress, but who really knows for sure? 

I felt a lot better this morning.  I was able to make it to crossfit today.  Hurray!  My head still hurts but it's only a slight headache.  Friday's are deadlift days, which are my favorite.  I really feel badass when I can lift heavy weights.  I lifted more than any of the girls there today.  I'm still the fattest, but it's nice to not be the weakest as well. 

We did a 10 minute kettle bell warm up.  Followed by 5 sets of 5 heavy dead lifts.  I pulled 205 lbs for my dead lifts.  My personal record for a single rep is 225, so I'm pretty sure the next time I test my limit, I'll be able to beat my last record.  205 is hard.  By the time I finished all my sets I was exhausted and sweat was dripping off my face.  They sure don't look like they are hard or that they do much, but if you research the deadlifts, they are one of the better lifts as far as results go.
Here's an article that goes into way more detail.

Our WOD was a 6 minute AMRAP.
5 air squats
5 kettle bell swings
10 air squats
10 kettle bell swings
etc etc until the 6 minutes runs out.

I used a 25 lb bell.  This was HARD!!  6 minutes sounds like it would be cake....it was not cake, it was more like torture.  Jonathan came by about half way through the WOD and told me that my squats were looking awesome.  He said my form was so much better than it used to.  Hurray!  I was ablet to get up to 25 squats and 17 kb swings before time was up.  My lungs burned SOOO bad! 
We finished off class with some cool down stretches and we were done. 


I'd really like to finish December strong.  No more sickness, no more migraines and getting in all my crossfit workouts.  Time to get in a hot bubble bath and relax.  It's flipping cold here today!  I think our high today should be about 3 degrees.  Brrrrr!!!!

Thursday, November 28, 2013

Thanksgiving 5K

Happy Thanksgiving!!  I'm looking forward to spending the day surrounded by family and good food, but first I'm going to be walking/running a Turkey Day 5K.  =)  I mapped it out on googlemaps and found the perfect 5K loop.  Hubby said he'd come with me and we'll bring the lab as well.  I think this should become a yearly tradition. 

Hope you all have a nice, relaxing day.♥

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Pain in the neck!

This is my neck after doing 125# back squats today.  I sent this picture to my coaches and they said I'm holding the bar too high and that I need to keep the bar lower.....basically on top of my traps.  Whatever traps are.  Derek said he'd show me tomorrow how to fix my form.  In the mean time I am freaking SORE!  Not only from all the back squats, which by the way was a 40 lb PR for me!  Woot woot!  I did 5 sets of 5 at 125 lbs.  That's a huge increase from what I have been doing. 

We also did FRAN yesterday.  I used 20 lbs more on my bar and boy oh boy did I feel it!  I woke up several times last night because every time I moved my muscles I would be in quite a bit of pain.  I'm taking today off completely to rest and recover.  Maybe I'll get a jump start on Thanksgiving preparations. 

Do you feel like because your body doesn't look the way you want that it holds you back from life?  I let how I feel about myself dictate just about every facet of my life.  I hate that!  I really wanted to wear a dress for the holidays but I feel like I'll look like a whale so I won't. In fact, because I still hate how my body looks I won't even go buy a new outfit.  I can't stand the thought of spending money on clothes that are huge.  I don't know how to love myself where I currently am and that really bothers me.  How does a person change that? 



Tuesday, November 19, 2013

1st ever family photos taken!

I've been  MIA for awhile now.  I developed a nasty case of bronchitis right before I left to go see my sister in Boise.  I had to cancel our 5K run.  I was miserable!  We pretty much just sat around and watched movies and talked.  Anything else hurt my lungs too much.  Even after I returned home I took off an entire week of crossfit to let my body heal. 

A couple weeks ago my husband took Friday off from work and he went with me to crossfit.  It was awesome for him to get to see what it's like first hand.  They let a family member try a class for free.  I know he wants to start boot camp soon.  He's itching to get involved in some sort of exercise and I think this will be perfect for him.  While there, we worked on deadlifts.  I hadn't been at crossfit for 2 1/2 weeks and during that time I was crazy sick and weak.  We worked on finding our 1 rep max.  Basically the most you can lift in just one lift.  My last 1 rep max was 160 lbs.  Meagan told me to not expect to lift that much since I've been gone for a long time and because I'd been sick.  I ended up lifting 205 lbs!!  I beat my last PR (personal record) by 45 lbs!  I was soo excited!  The WOD was awful.  I could really tell my endurance was way down. 

Last week I just went to class twice and this week I fully plan on going all three days.  It feels good to be back on the horse. 

So I hired Meagan ( one of my wonderful trainers) to take some photos of me and my family.  We've never.....like EVER....had family photos taken.  Every year my husband wants to and I decline saying that I'm too fat and that we can do it the following year.  This has been going on for 11 years.  Well Meagan posted on facebook that she does photography and I looked at some of her work and it was really good.  I went ahead, bit the bullet, and signed us up.  It was extremely hard for me to let someone take full body shots of me.  I hate sounding so selfish.....but all I could think about was how huge I still was.  I got our photos back a few days ago.  Meagan did an amazing job!  There are a few photos I'd like to banish forever, but instead I'm going to keep them so I can remember how I truly looked through my journey.  I much prefer the pictures from the waist up, but whatever...it is what it is.  I thought I'd share a few pictures...some good ones,  and one or two that make me feel insecure. 

 





An ass picture, really?!  BLAH!  It's like twice as big as my husband's.  On a good note, I had a couple people this week tell me at crossfit  that I was looking slimmer.  Hey, I'll take any compliment I can get. 

We also just got a 9 week old miniature dachshund puppy.  We named her Juniper.  She's a sweetie pie.  ♥

Thursday, October 31, 2013

full blown bronchitis

Well no wonder I was feeling so icky.  My nasty cold turned into nasty bronchitis.  I love how when you get it the Dr. will tell you to "get lots of rest".  I'm averaging 3-4 hours of sleep per night due to all the coughing.  That's awful! 

I fly to Boise this afternoon to visit my sister.  We're changing all our plans to basically staying in and just watching movies together since I'm not feeling well.  It'll still be fun just to have a break from the kids and spend some quality time w/ my sis.

Last night after trying to fall asleep for several hours, I got up and drew a hot bath.  I poured in a few drops of tea tree oil into the bath and soaked for almost an hour.  I can't believe what a difference that has made.  Instead of tight cough it's now loose and it feels like the mucus in the bronchial tubes is breaking free.  Hurray for little improvements!

Yesterday, Meagan my crossfit trainer, took family photos of us.  We've never had nice photos taken.....EVER!  My husband has been wanting them done for years and every year I tell him the same thing..........when I lose some more weight,  when I go down a few more sizes...etc. etc.  I still have a LONG way to go, but I did it.  It was incredibly hard for me to let someone take full body shots of me.  I don't mind how I look from the shoulders up......it's everything below that makes me uncomfortable.  I'm nervous about getting the pictures back.  It's like you know in your head you are really large but nothing puts it quite in perspective like seeing your entire body in a photo does. 

While Meagan was taking our pictures I asked her about working out at crossfit while getting over bronchitis and she said that after I get home from Boise I can go back to class but they'll just have me do exercises that won't strain my body/lungs very much.  I'm thankful because I didn't want to be forced to still on my tush for another 1-3 weeks while I get over this thing. 

Happy Halloween!

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

zero appetite

So two weeks ago was amazing.  I felt strong, and I saw incredible gains in my fitness.  Last week on  Tuesday I helped some friends of ours split and stack tons of firewood.  These chunks of wood I had to carry over to the log splitter were all approx.  100 lbs each.  There is no way I'd have been able to help with that task before crossfit, no flippin way.  I felt great, worked for several hours and came home to veg for the rest of the day.  Soon after I got home my throat started to hurt and by bedtime it hurt so bad I could barely even swallow water.  I got ZERO sleep that night.  I was in so much pain it was ridiculous!  The next day I got all the other symptoms that come with a nasty cold.  I've been sick over a week and I'm still really sick.  Everything has settled into my chest causing me to cough CONSTANTLY!  I even pulled a muscle in my neck a couple nights ago due to the coughing fits. To say I'm frustrated is an understatement.  I leave for Boise in two days.  Unless a miracle happens I'm not going to be able to run my 5K that I've been training for.  I'm really really at my wits end.  I'm exhausted and have no appetite.  It's almost like I'm too tired to even go to the kitchen to find something to eat.  So basic house cleaning has gone to the wayside as well.  My husband has been out of town all of last week and part of this week.  Somehow I'm supposed to pull the house together, get food prepared for hubby and the kids to eat while I'm gone, balance the finances, and get costumes finished for the kids.   AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!  I think beating my head against a brick wall sounds much more appealing.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Fantastic end to the week!

Thursday was a great day.  I had three different people at crossfit tell me that they could tell I was getting smaller.  YAY!! 

Warm Up:
thoracic mobility
glute activation
Skill: ass-ist
3×10 romanian deadlift  ( I was able to do 90 lbs, much less weight than regular deadlifts.)
3×10, 1×15 BB glute bridge ( I went way heavier with this that I ever have before.  I used 140lbs)

WOD: Dels
20″ max effort sled drag, with 1:40 rest. Load up with as much as you can move quickly- stronger athletes will get bodyweight+. Repeat 8x.  (I used 135 lbs.  The most I've ever used before was about 100 lbs.)
after, grab a heavy kettlebell and swing (russian):
10 reps, 2 breaths
15 reps, 3 breaths
25 reps, 4 breaths
50 reps.
keep tech snappy and perfect, with as quick of a tempo as you can manage. (I used an 18lb bell. This was harder than I thought it was going to be.  Those last 50 swings were killer!)

I left Thursday feeling on top of the world. 


Friday was also fabulous!

Warm Up:
buddy row, get 500m each.  Teams of three.   ( I was able to row faster than I've ever rowed before.  Yay!!!!)
-rest when you get off the rower
-when a buddy transitions to rest, get 10 perfect squats.
Skill: snatch
thacker WU+
12 sets, ascending: snatch from position 2+snatch from position 1
Skill Option: KB ascendency 
one-arm swing, 10 reps
lateral swing, 10 reps
KB snatch, 10 reps.
switch sides, get 4 sets each side.
after, get 3×10 1 arm sott’s press
WOD: Hurler
20 pistol (alternating, 20 each leg) ( I did box step ups while holding a 25lb kettlebell)
then, 21-15-9 reps of

front squat 135/95 ( Used 45lb bar.....not even close to where I want to be on the front squats)

ring dip (not strong enough to do these yet, so I did pushups instead)

finish with 150x double under. ( For those that can't do double unders we were to attempt to do 50 and then do 300 single unders.  I actually was able to do 15 double unders.  15  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I have never been able to even do 1 before.  I couldn't believe it! )


All in all it was a fabulous week!  I'm so thankful since the last few weeks I've felt down, weak and not very motivated.  I so needed a good week. 

It's a little chilly, but it's a clear blue sky and gorgeous outside.  Enjoy your weekend, I know I'm going to.  =)

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Panicked at the grocery store!

I keep forgetting to mention this in my blogs.  I don't know what the heck is going on lately but whenever I go grocery shopping I get all panicked and nervous.  I'm embarrassed to be there.  I'm humiliated that people can see me buying food, even if it's healthy food.  I've never experienced this ever before.  I won't look people in the eye, I find myself darting down isles with the fewest people to avoid being seen.  What the heck?!  I haven't told anyone about this yet.  Have you ever experienced such a thing?

Biggest Loser Season 15 Premiere + Hearts and Barbells 1st workout

I love the Biggest Loser!  It inspires me and I bawl like a baby each week when I watch it.  My husband thinks I'm crazy.  He doesn't understand why people watch those kinds of shows.  For me it's because I can relate.  I know the pain of being heavy.  I know what it feels like.  I know the struggle.  I know what having a food addiction is like.  I get it.  I've been there....and am still there in a way. 

Yesterday I attended our crossfit's first Hearts and Barbell class.  I was insanely nervous.  All day I kept telling myself that attending this class was a joke.  I was a nobody.  It wasn't for me.  It was for a true athlete.  Negative thought after negative thought all day long.  I was a relatively small class.  They only allow the 1st 12 people that sign up to attend. 

I was shaking in my boots when I walked through those doors last night.  Again, I feel pretty secure in my 9:30am class....but the evening classes I don't know anyone and feel like it's day one all over again.  I signed in, got my kiddos settled into the child area, used the restroom, and started stretching.  Everyone had proper lifting shoes but me.  Ugh, I hate being the only person who doesn't fit in. 

Well the workout was killer, but definitely in a good way.  Derek mentioned at the beginning of the class that it was ok to stop a take a breather if things got too intense.  Much to my surprise I was able to keep up with the group.  BOOYA!   Now I was lifting the lightest amount of weight, but who freaking cares.  I went, I conquered my fear of the unknown, and I finished the class.  I really really liked it.  I'm looking forward to going next Tuesday night as well. 

We did a ton of hang squat snatches.  These get easier as your form gets better.  Once you get the hang of them, you feel a little bit bad ass.  =) 



I love using the barbell more than almost anything else at crossfit.  I think I will continue with this new class.  I am SOOOO incredibly sore today that I'm going to use today to rest and heal and then will go to my regular crossfit class on Thursday and Friday.


Oh and I must say that going to class in the morning has another advantage.  Last night while I was there I noticed that as it got darker and darker outside that all the windows started acting like mirrors and everytime I passed a window I could see my awful reflection.  Inside I do not feel the way I look on the outside.  I am getting anxious for my outside to catch up to my thinner mental self. 

Monday, October 14, 2013

Crushed today's workout....well kinda

Felt great this morning.  I got lots of much needed sleep and woke up feeling energized and roaring to go.  It's also a gorgeous Fall day.  Clear blue sky, a light crisp wind and gorgeous Fall colors everywhere you look. 

Our warm up was a partner medicine ball run.  We used a 15 pound ball and would throw it to our partner, then run ahead about 10 feet and they throw it back.  We did that for 300 meters and then we switched to squatting and then springing up and throwing the ball to our partner and then running ahead back and forth for the last 100 meters. 

Our skill set was a KILLER!!!  We were told to grab two kettle bells, they didn't have to be the same weight.  I grabbed a 25 lb bell and an 18 lb bell.  We went outside and started walking.  J (Jonathan) told us to raise our right arm all the way up and lock out the elbow.  We walked about 20 feet and then switched arms.  Next we held both bells up by our chins and did squats.  Deep squats and then we'd stand up, over and over for a couple minutes.  Next we held both bells up above our head and walked about 100 meters.  Then we stopped and did kettle bell swings with both bells at the same time.  My arms and lungs were burning so bad!  We then started walking again, alternating arms above the head.  Next we did about 100 meters of lunges with the bells. Finally we were told to just do a farmers carry for an additional 200 meters and then go inside for the WOD.  Even though it's COLD outside, I was pouring sweat.  I was regretting the size bells I chose.....although I was able to complete the skill set, so I guess I should be pleased. 

The WOD was done with a partner. 

10-1 reps (so we'd each to 10 of each move, then 9 of each move, then 8 then 7 and so on and so forth until you get down to 1 each. 

They gave us 20 minutes to complete it. 

The exercises were
*thrusters

*pull ups

*hand release push ups

I felt great going into the workout.  I was fast.  My partner is a gal who is fairly new and is slower than me.  Although she's stronger than me in some areas, she's also slower.  If the WOD was completed then we'd have done a total of 55 of each of the moves.  We weren't able to get the last three rounds in before time was up.  So we finished 49 of each of the moves.  It was ok.  I know I could've finished the WOD with a faster partner, but all in all it was not a big deal.  We all got in an amazing workout and we tried our best and that it what it's all about. 

They're offering a new class on Tuesday nights from 6:30-7:30 called Hearts and Barbells.  All I know is that it has something to do with lots of heavy lifting.  I'm going to go tomorrow evening to check it out.  I'm a little nervous since the 9:30 am class in my safe bubble.  I know the people that go and I feel comfortable with them now.  I'm guessing there will be a ton of people I don't know attending this new class and that makes me really nervous.  Eeeek! 

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

I talked to him like a royal B!

I went to bed super early last night.  7pm to be exact.  I hoped that a ton of sleep would leave me feeling relaxed and refreshed.  Instead I woke up feeling exhausted.  My eyelids were not wanting to cooperate. 

I made it to crossfit this morning.  Huge accomplishment considering how I'm feeling physically and mentally.  Everything we did felt impossibly difficult.  I can tell such a big difference in my endurance and strength when I take a few days off. 

Our warm up was 5 Turkish get ups on each side and then using a slightly heavier bell we did another 3 on each side. 

Our skill set was all about pull ups and negative pull ups.  Jonathan helped me get a super thick band and work on my negative pull ups.  I felt like I was humiliating myself.  I felt weak and it pissed me off!  He told me he could tell how much better I'm getting and I just looked him straight in the eyes and in a sarcastic bitchy way said, "really?!" .  This caused him to stammer a bit and collect himself.  He said that he hadn't seen me in the last 6 weeks because he's been mostly doing evening classes but that he could see a difference in how I look since he last saw me.  At that point he pretty  much excused himself to go help some other people. 

I feel really bad for being a jerk.  I guess I just felt like he was blowing smoke up my rear.  I still feel weak and fat and stupid and lame and and and.......
Maybe he really can tell a difference and I'm just cranky and being a negative nancy. 

Anyhoo our WOD was to get in groups of 4.  Two of us had to drag the sled down and back up the alley and then do 20 meter bear crawl and 10 native jump squats.  We repeated everything twice. 

I'm dead to the world after today's class.  I hope I feel a lot more energy and strength come Friday and maybe I'll get the chance to apologize to Jonathan for being a snarky jerk. 

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Is this always going to be a struggle?

So much for eating 100% Paleo and so much for exercising every day in October.  Why does it seem like every single time I make a challenge for myself I end up screwing everything up and failing miserably?  I'm so flippin mad at myself! 

I haven't worked out since Wednesday.  It's been an entire week.  I'm so pathetic!  I have no excuses.  Not really.  Still dealing with crazy marriage issues.  Hubby and I have been at each other's throats and it's starting to take a toll on me mentally.  I feel depressed and feel like I'm never going to succeed. 

How do I keep a positive attitude?  How do I keep keeping on?  I wish I had an answer.  I will be going to crossfit tomorrow and again on Friday.  I need to fix my eating and get back into getting some sort of exercise in daily. 

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Kettlebell day #3 workout

Three days into October and I've done some sort of exercise each day.  Just need to keep it up for the remainder of the month. 

Today was all about KETTLEBELLS.  Woohoo!  I'm amazed at all the different exercises a person can do with those.

I ended up doing a workout similar to yesterday's skill set.

Round 1:

10 lateral kb (kettlebell) swings per arm,10 kb snatches per arm,10 kb power cleans per arm,1 minute kb native squat,10 kb sit ups

Round 2:

10 lateral kb swings per arm,10 overhead kb swings,1 minute kb native squat,10 kb sit ups

Round 3:

10 lateral kb swings per arm,10 kb swings,10 kb goblet squats,10 kb sit ups

Round 4:

10 lateral kb (kettlebell) swings per arm,10 kb overhead swings,1 minute kb native squat,10 kb sit ups

I was able to get through everything in about 18 minutes.  I was very out of breath, but still felt good. 


Wednesday, October 2, 2013

"to the pain"

Anyone know this quote?  "to the pain"   It's from my most favorite movie, The Princess Bride.

Humperdinck: First things first, to the death.
Westley: No. To the pain.
Humperdinck: I don't think I'm quite familiar with that phrase.
Westley: I'll explain, and I'll use small words so that you'll be sure to understand, you warthog-faced buffoon.
Humperdinck: That may be the first time in my life a man has dared insult me.
Westley: It won't be the last. "To the pain" means the first thing you lose will be your feet, below the ankles, then your hands at the wrists. Next, your nose.
Humperdinck: [losing his patience] And then my tongue, I suppose. I killed you too quickly the last time, a mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight.
Westley: I wasn't finished! The next thing you lose will be your left eye, followed by your right —
Humperdinck: [exasperated] And then my ears. I understand! Let's get on with it-
Westley: WRONG! Your ears you keep, and I'll tell you why: So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear God, what is that thing?" will echo in your perfect ears. That is what "to the pain" means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever.

Today's workout was "to the pain".  Well...........it was close.  haha

Our warm up was getting into groups of 3 and while 1 person rows 250 meters, the other two are doing junkyard dog.  We each took a turn.  I must say, that was the fastest I've ever rowed in my life!  I was able to row at a pace of 1:51.....which is a far cry better that was I used to row which was 2:35. 

Our skill set was a killer!

4 rounds

10 left handed lateral kettlebell swings

10 right handed lateral kettlebell swings

10 left handed regular kb swings

10 right handed regular kb swings

10 kb power cleans (using two bells)

1 minute native squat while holding a kettle bell

FOUR FREAKING ROUNDS!!!!!!!!!!!!   Sweat was pouring off my body.  There was a disgusting amount of sweat on the floor all around me.  Everything burned, my muscles were tapped out!

Our WOD was hard as well. 

10 manmakers (BARF BARF BARF these are so hard!)

20 pull ups ( I did ring rows)

800 meter run

20 pull ups

10 more manmakers

I ran 700 out of the 800 meters.  HUGE accomplishment for me!  Especially after how tired I was.  BUT I did it!!  I kept up with the group and finished the workout.  It feels amazing!  I did cry on the way home though.  I know I pushed myself to my very limit.  Those last few manmakers had me grunting and groaning.  It took every last bit of energy I had to get them done. 

I'm not sure what exercise I'm going to get in tomorrow, but it'll be something easy going and not too strenuous.  I hope Friday's WOD isn't as hard as today's was.  OY!

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Moving for 31 days

Today I took my dog on a 3.5 mile hike.  It was so pretty today.  The sun would peek out from the clouds every once in a while.  It poured rain a few times, but for the most part it was lovely. 


View from the top of the ridge.


Since I'm eating Paleo for the entirety of October, I thought I'd give myself another challenge....to get some exercise in every single day.  I will crossfit M, W, and F......the rest of the week can be anything from a hike, a walk, whatever.....just as long as I get in some exercise every single day. 

You know what else I'm going to do different this October??  I'm not going to buy one single piece of Halloween candy.  None.  For me that's a huge deal.  I'd always buy several bags of various mini candy bars and many times I'd eat most of the candy and have to buy more before the 31st.  This year the cycle of binge eating candy stops. 

I leave for Boise on the 31st and I really want to be as fit and I can be before my 5K run with my sister.  It's the final countdown!  Do you have any goals for October?

Monday, September 30, 2013

Stronger than my husband?!?!

On Saturday my husband asked if we could do a crossfit style workout in the garage together.  Although he's still slim, he's lost a lot of muscle since we got married and has replaced it with a soft belly.  He still looks quite slim in his clothes, but I can tell a huge difference in his body composition between now and when we got married 11 years ago.

Anyhoo so we go out into the garage and since we have only a kettlebell, I came up with a workout that would use mostly our body weight. 

We did 5 rounds of:

20 jump squats

25 push ups

30 second plank

30 kettlebell swings

Half way into the 2nd round he had to stop.  He said he couldn't catch his breath and his arms and legs hurt too bad.  I told him to catch his breath and then to keep going.  I continued the workout while he sat down and watched me.  During my 5th round he got back up and finished his 2nd round and then a 3rd.  By that time he stopped and said he couldn't do anymore. 

I must say that it felt freaking amazing to see myself beat him.  Now I know that if he actually started working out on a regular basis, he'd surpass me in very little time.  For the time being, I'm going to relish in my accomplishments.  I can tell it hurt his ego a bit.  What guy would want to admit that his obese wife beat him in a workout?  After a few hours he came up to me and gave me a big hug and told me he was proud of me.  ♥  Little things like that make it all worth it.

Today was a good day at crossfit. 

Our warm up was:

20 meter bear crawl

20 meter crab walk

3 minutes  AMRAP burpees

I felt dead to the world after the burpees.  Haha

The skill set was two rounds:

7 right handed kettlebell snatches and 7 windmills

7 left handed kettlebell snatches and 7 windmills

1 minute native squat

15 kettlebell sit ups (those were freaking HARD)

10  two second squat box jumps

The WOD was an 8 minute AMRAP:

5 hang power snatches

50 double unders or (150 single unders)

15 push ups

I was able to complete exactly 3 full rounds in those 8 minutes


I'm going to make myself a paleo turkey taco salad with homemade guacamole for lunch.  I'm starving!  ;)

Friday, September 27, 2013

What a way to end the week!

I feel like whenever I blog I tend to say the same things.....I woke up and didn't want to go to crossfit.  haha  But it's always the truth.  It was a cold and dark morning and staying in my warm bed and catching some extra Zzzz's seemed much more appealing than putting on workout clothes and going to the gym. 

I guess the good news is that I DID go and got my butt handed to me on a silver platter. 

We started off with ladder drills.  This was my 1st time doing them.  They were actually kind of fun.  They put a rope ladder on the ground and we had to do various things like jump squatting on each rung, or hopping in and out of the squares etc etc. 

For the skill set we did 4 sets of 5 Turkish get-ups on each arm.  After the 1st two rounds we did four 20 second plank holds, then more Turkish get-ups, followed by 4 more plank holds.  My core, my legs, and my arms were shaking.  My muscles were TIRED!

Our WOD was awful.  I felt nauseous half way through.  Thankfully I didn't get sick.  In groups of two we did (all with weighted bar bells)

50 squat thrusters
20 walking lunges
50 overhead squats
20 walking lunges
50 back squats
20 walking lunges

My partner and I finished in 9:54

I just wanted to lie on the ground in my puddle of sweat and not move.  I'm so so so tired!!  That WOD was a fine line from my breaking point.  I could feel myself get a little teary eyed towards the end, which always tells me that I hit my limit. 

I'm going to take a long, warm, bubble bath and possibly a nap before the kids get home from school.  I think I deserve it. 

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

1st week of the Paleo Challenge is officially over


1 week down, 5 more to go with this Paleo Challenge.  My first week has been chalk full of temptations of all sorts.  All in all I think I've done great!  I miss cheese like crazy as well as half n half for my coffee.  I can do this for 5 more weeks.  It'll be so worth it when I go to Boise.  Not only will I thoroughly enjoy my food when I'm there, but I know my clothes will be fitting better and running the 5k will be easier.  I tried on a sweater that my sister gave me a couple years ago.  It's never fit, like not even close.  It was so tight I've contemplated getting rid of it several times.  I was able to wear it yesterday and it fit perfectly.  Hurray!!!! 

Crossfit is always hard, but there are days where it's hard and it feels good, and then days where it's hard and you want to die.  Today I wanted to die. 

Our warm up was kettle bell maxercise.  Basically we did several minutes of nonstop kettle bell exercises. 

Our skill set was all about hang cleans.

It was 10 sets:
flat footed clean pull
hang power clean
hang squat clean
jerk

I loved the jerks.  It was my first time ever doing them.  I must admit I did feel a little bit like a bad ass. 

Our WOD was in a group of 3:

row 3000 meters

120 burpees

I'm slowly conquering my fear of running.  It's not as hard anymore.  Rowing on the other hand suck so bad!  It's crazy hard and my stomach fat likes to get in the way, which makes it harder to catch my breath.  I wanted to quit so bad.  If it wasn't for my group/team, I don't know how well I would've faired. 


It's only 7pm and I'm tired enough to go to bed.  Unfortunately my husband is out of town working, so I'll have to stay up and get the kids off to bed in an hour. 

I'm looking forward to seeing how my body changes during the last 5 weeks of this challenge.  It feels really good to fuel my body on clean foods.  My mood is better, I sleep SO much better, and I think it's a good example for my children. 

Monday, September 23, 2013

Test workout

This was a tough weekend!  My husband got turtle cheesecake from a coworker to celebrate his birthday which he brought home.  Then we took the kids to a local corn maze and afterwards hubby and the kids shared a giant elephant ear.  Sunday hubby got a pumpkin spice latte from starbucks and ate macadamia salted caramel clusters.  AHHHGGGGG!!!!!!!!  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!    The good news is I survived.  I am sorely missing my morning cup of coffee.  I can't handle black coffee, I wish I could. 

So today in honor or everyone starting the Paleo challenge they had us do a test workout.  Basically we will see how well we do today and then in a month we will do the workout again and see how much better we can do. 

Our warm up sucked butt.  We did partner line drills.  Bear crawls, crab walks, sprints, long jumps, blah.  I was tired after just the warm up. 

Our skill set was using kettle bell snatches to go right into kettle bell wind mills.  We then did some ARMBAR stretches and kneaded out our partner's Achilles.

The WOD was a 15 min AMRAP.

5 burpees

7 pull ups

10 goblet squats

I was able to finish exactly 8 rounds using a 20 lb dumbbell for the goblet squat.

I wasn't super happy with only getting 8 rounds since the average seemed to be around 9.  Oh well, I did my best and that's what I could do.  I'm anxious to see how my performance differs when I do this WOD again.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Palleo Challenge Day 2 of 42

Yesterday was stressful.  Actually beyond stressful.  I felt like I was at my very limit and if one more thing went wrong or got piled on my "to do" list I was going to throw myself off a bridge.  I actually broke down into tears by bedtime.  I won't get into all of it, you'd be bored to tears and probably want to throw yourself off a bridge as well.  The point of saying all that was DESPITE all the stress, I didn't cheat.  I kept to my paleo eating and even got in a 3.5 mile hike. 

Today has also been quite successful.  My husband got a bonus and we were able to pay off some medical bills and a few other small debts.  That felt good!  He also wanted to go celebrate by going out to dinner.  We ended up going to the Texas Roadhouse.  I was a good girl.  I stayed away from the homemade rolls with cinnamon butter, the roasted peanuts, and the cheesy bacon fries they ordered for an appetizer.  I had an ice water, filet mignon, and steamed vegetables.  I left feeling more than satisfied.  My dinner was delicious and I didn't feel deprived at all.  Two days down with forty more to go. 

My goal is to get through this 6 week challenge with zero cheats, none, zilch, nada.  My mother's birthday is coming up as well as my own.  This will be the 1st time in my life that I won't have cake on our birthdays.  It's a good thing.  I need to learn that I can handle a special occasion without HAVING to have treats. 

Things I love about Paleo......I'm never hungry.  The food is so incredibly satisfying.  It fills me up but never leaves me feeling sick or bloated.  I also love how many different fruits and veggies I eat on a daily basis.  It's fantastic! 

Things I dislike..........I miss cheese.  I also really like beans and legumes and those aren't allowed.   This time of year, as things cool down, I love a hearty soup with beans and veggies and meat.  mmmm so good. 

I'd love to be down another pant size by the time I go to Boise.  Every extra pound I can melt away is going to make running the 5K just that much easier.  I'm also flying Southwest Airlines and they have just 17in seats!  I flew to Boise in June of 2012 and I couldn't buckle my seatbelt.  I lost a little bit of weight before I went again in November and was able to just barely buckle the belt.  Since then I've lost over 30 inches and 2 pant sizes, so I KNOW I'll be able to buckle myself in with ease, but I still don't want to be oozing out of my seat onto the person next to me.  It's not only embarrassing, but I feel bad for the other passenger.  It's not their fault I'm big.  They shouldn't have to suffer for it. 

Tomorrow we're taking the kids to a giant corn maze.  Can't wait!

Thursday, September 19, 2013

feeling like a freaking heifer!

Today starts day 1 of the 6 week Paleo Challenge.  I took my measurements this morning as well as "before" photos.  I got a back, side, and front photo of myself in exercise pants and a sports bra.  I looked at those photos and immediately wanted to throw the camera across the room and smash in into a hundred pieces.  5 months of crossfit, over 30 inches lost so far and I'm still flipping HUGE!  I don't feel like I'm as fat as the pictures showed I was. 

I will wait to post my hideous heifer pictures after my 6 weeks is up along with the after photos.  I hate looking like this, hate hate hate HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  You know those people that tell you to love yourself no matter where you are in your journey?  Well, I have the overwhelming urge to karate chop them in the neck today.  Just sayin'.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

6 week Paleo challenge starts TOMORROW

After getting pissed and cranky about the Paleo Challenge rules at my crossfit I have decided to just do my own thing.  I'll be starting my 6 week challenge tomorrow.  I leave for Boise on Halloween and that will be the day after the challenge is over.  Perfect timing!  So I won't get to win any money or prizes or even be part of the group who is recognized as being part of this diet eating lifestyle.  So what.  The truth is everything I'm doing is for me.  I should be glad to do it just for my own health and well being.  That should be my true reward.  Still trying to convince myself that money isn't everything.  *sigh*

I felt pretty good this morning despite the chaos of trying to get all three kids out of bed, dressed, fed, lunches made, hair brushed, and out the door before their buses arrived.  Sometimes I feel like I should have the The Flight Of The Bumble Bee playing in the background. 

Crossfit was a challenge today.  Our WOD was in honor of a gentleman who was killed in action while serving our country.  I believe he served with Derek.  I think it's neat that crossfit as a whole honor men and women that have been killed while serving our country. 

Our WOD was 5 rounds:

12 deadlifts

9 hang power cleans

6 push jerks 


All of the lighter bar bells were taken so I went with a bar that I thought might be too heavy and used just 5 pound weights on either side just to keep the bar off the floor......55 pounds in all. 

Surprisingly I was able to complete the WOD using 55lbs instead of what I wanted to use which was around 45lbs. 

I'm exhausted and my arms and hamstrings feel like rubber. 

I need to go to Walmart today and get myself a notebook.  I want to start keeping a very detailed log of my workouts and the weights I'm using so I can refer to it as I continue on this crossfit journey as well as keep a detailed record of what I'm eating every day.  I will take my measurements tomorrow morning and again on Halloween (6 weeks later). 

I think since today is my last day of eating nonPaleo foods, I'm going to get a Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte and maybe even have pizza for dinner. Naughty naughty! 

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

I want it MY way!

Finally feeling better, hurray!  I did make it to crossfit yesterday and it was great to get back in the game. 

Warm up: run 400 meters then do a partner burpee ladder.  Example:  I do one burpee, partner does one burpee, I do two burpees, partner does two burpees etc etc until we both get to 7 burpees. 

Skill set: kettle bell snatches, ab rollers, jump squats
We went over and over the proper techniques and then did 5 rounds of 5 snatches on each arm, 10 ab rollers and 5 jump squats.

WOD: This was a EMOTM (every minute on the minute) for 12 minutes:

3 kettle bell snatches on each arm and 7 up/downs (similar to a burpee)

I AM SO SORE TODAY!!!!!!!


So we finally found out the details of our paleo challenge and I'm super bummed.  Usually it sounds like if you want to participate you pay $50.  After 6 weeks the 3 people with the most impressive results get the cash prize.  I believe Meagan said last time the winner won a few hundred dollars.  Unfortunately this time they changed the rules.  It's $15, no cash prize, and the $ goes towards a bbq meal that all participants will get after they complete the challenge.

 I don't want any freaking food, I want to win $$$$$$!!!!!  I'm sorry but winning $ to me is a hugely motivating.  Eating a bbq meal is not.  I know I know I'm acting like a spoiled child who isn't getting things her way.  Still.......I'm quite frustrated.  I'm embarrassed to admit I actually felt like crying after I read the new rules.  *sigh*



Other rules include:

before/after pics
before/after weight
before/after measurements

doing a minimum of 3 WODS a week

a food log

We can partner up to support each other.  I don't really have any friends there, so I guess I'm on my own. 

I'm sure that if I can stick to 6 weeks of Paleo and 6 weeks of crossfit 3 times a week plus running.....that I'll see some decent progress in my health and fitness goals.  I could've really used that prize money. 

Oh well.  Such is life.  Time to "build a bridge and get over it".  (as my husband likes to say)  ha!

Friday, September 13, 2013

It caught up with me, party is cancelled.

I thought I was feeling better, but last night was awful.  Double ear infections, sore throat and a fever to boot.  Needless to the say the party I was going to have for hubby tonight has been cancelled along with the hike with my mother and going to crossfit. 

Man I hate being sick!!!!!!!!  It ruins everything!  :(

Thursday, September 12, 2013

BURNED THE ZUCCHINI WHILE DREAMING OF CAKE

I pulled myself up by my bootstraps and made it into the gym yesterday.  Still not feeling great, but I didn't want to miss anymore workouts.  We started off with a bunch of exercises that activated our glutes.  Our backsides were definitely "warmed up" by the end.  Our WOD was 3 rounds of

* pulling a weighted sled down the alley and then back up the alley

* 2 minute AMRAP 5 burpees and 5 sit ups

We were in groups of three.  It took our group 28 minutes and 2 seconds to complete this WOD.  I believe we were definitely the slowest of the groups.  That's ok though, we all got a great workout.  Two of the girls in my group are brand spankin' new.  It was nice not to be the new girl who didn't know what to do.  Last time I did the sleds I put 45 lbs on it.  Yesterday I used 85 lbs.  It was hard and it kicked my rear, but it was totally doable. 

Today I'm getting ready to go clean my brother's house and then I'll be getting in a run before the kids get home from school.  Tomorrow I'm going to crossfit and afterwards my mother and I are hiking Mineral Ridge....the 3.3 mile hike.  After that I'll be baking up a couple apple pies for my husband's birthday party. 

I found out yesterday that our Paleo challenge at crossfit will start Sept. 23rd and go through Oct. 25th.  I'm super excited to get on board and going 100% Paleo for 32 consecutive days.  It'll end just a few days away from my trip to Boise to visit my sister and our 5K run. 

By the way, the title of this post is what happened yesterday.  While pan frying my zucchini yesterday I lost track of time as I was looking at pictures of cake on the computer.  My food addiction still feels very much alive. 

Monday, September 9, 2013

I blame the kids.........

I'm sick.  AGAIN!  I feel like I blog about being sick like every other month.  This time I'm blaming the kids.  Every time they start school one or more of them contracts some sort of illness and brings it home to share with me.  And being the wonderful loving mother that I am, I accept their gift of illness.  They each had a dentist apt this morning so I put off today's workout for tomorrow.....at this point I'm not sure I'll actually be able to follow through with it after all.  I think I may just use tomorrow to rest and nap while the kids are at school. 

Hope you all are staying WELL.  Fingers crossed this passes quickly and things can get back to "normal"  whatever that means.  ;)

Friday, September 6, 2013

Man Makers

The last couple of days have been rough, really rough.  My husband and I have not been getting along so well.  He's super stressed about his job and I'm stressed trying to keep everything at home together.  So to make a super long story short, things have been stressful and we're not doing so well at leaning on each other when we should. 

I woke up today depressed and sad.  It was raining and super dark outside.  I just wanted to send the kids off to school and go back to bed and watch movies. 

Instead I got my workout clothes washed and dried, a protein shake made and headed out the door.  I'm always glad when I go.  I feel so much happier and stronger than I did when I woke up. 

Our warm up was to grab a partner and throw a medicine ball back and forth.  We did overhead tosses where we'd catch the ball, go into a deep squat and then toss the ball overhead to our partner.  We did a few others and then moved onto our skill sets.  We practiced Turkish get-ups.  We'd start off with a light kettle bell and then move up to our max weight.  The heaviest bell I was able to use was 26 lbs.  It was SO hard to do and my left arm, which is definitely my weak arm, felt like it was going to buckle under the weight.  Then I look over and see girls who are half my size using 50 lb kettle bells with ease.  
 
 
Our WOD was doing Man Makers.  As many as we could in 10 minutes.  This is a quick video clip of what a man maker looks like.

Video of how to do man makers


They were hard, and my whole body is dead to the world but I feel really good inside.  I'm crossing my fingers that this weekend goes smoothly.  I can't stand tension within the home.  Hope you all have a happy and healthy weekend.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Partner Up

I woke up with the mother of all migraines.  I wish I knew what caused them.  My mother gets them as well as my sister.  It was so bad I knew I wouldn't be able to make it to crossfit, but to my surprise the two Excedrin I took worked shortly before I normally leave for class.  So because I felt better, I had no excuses not to go.  I'm glad I did.  I loved the warm up.  It was two sets of 3 different movements.  They weren't hard, but they really opened up some of the different muscle groups. 

The skill set was doing 5 strict presses every minute on the minute for 10 minutes.  These were tough, but felt awesome!

The WOD was a partner WOD.  I tend to really hate being partnered up.  Mostly because I'm slow, and I feel like I drag my partner(s) down.  Today one of my very favorite crossfit peeps was back after a few months away.  I was worried she had quit or had moved to a different class.  Apparently she had surgery and was recovering.  So we ended up being partners which worked out well.  I'm always slow and because she hasn't been working out in several weeks, she was slow.  Yay for the slow peeps!  haha

We did 6 rounds (3 each) of

250 meter row

15 burpees (they had me do ten)

10 push presses with the bar

During my 1st round of push presses I had too much weight on the bar and literally hit my face with the bar as I was bringing it back down from being overhead.  I felt like a complete idiot because as I looked up from hitting my face there was Derek, watching me.  Oh how come when I do the dumbest things there are always people watching.  Hey Derek, watch how coordinated I am.  Watch me slap my face against the bar.  Watch me act like a moron.  There are days that hiding under a rock seems like a better option than going out in public. 

This WOD was BRUTAL!  Those last 10 push presses made my arms burn like crazy!

We finished in 14 minutes 46 seconds.  Towards the end of my 3rd round I started feeling a little light headed and sick.  BUT I finished and I'm so so so glad I went.  I feel so much better mentally and physically when I go. 

Tomorrow is running and Friday will be another crossfit session.  Bring it on!

Monday, September 2, 2013

Running in the rain

I woke up today to rain.  I forced myself to go running anyway.  It actually felt quite invigorating.  I can hardly believe how my running endurance has changed since I first started this program. The first week you run just 60 seconds and then walk for 90 over and over.  Those 60 seconds seemed like an hour!  My legs would cramp up and I'd get terrible side aches.  Now I'm able to run for 3 minutes at a time.  I don't get cramps or side aches anymore either.  I'm really starting to look forward to running that 5K with my sister in two months. 


I have a house full of healthy food so there are no excuses this week why I can't get my workouts in and nourish my body properly. 

Have you ever heard of  Bountiful Baskets?  It's a fabulous nonprofit organization that gives you tons of fresh produce for only $15 a basket.  You get between 5 and 6 different varieties of fruit and 5 to 6 varieties of veggies each week.  It's a great way to eat healthy and not break the bank.  You can order as often or as little as you like.  There is no sign up fees, no commitment, just good food for a great price.  Check it out!  

www.bounitfulbaskets.org



Sunday, September 1, 2013

cake, pie and donuts

I ended up not running on Thursday and wimped out on going to crossfit on Friday.  I was in a super bad mood and just couldn't bring myself to leave the house.  What is my problem?  I'm willing to bed I deal with some sort of depression issues.  My mood swings are a bit on the crazy side.  When I'm happy I'm SUPER happy....when I'm sad I'm SUPER sad...etc etc.......then again....maybe that's borderline bipolar.  All I know is I hate feeling like this but I can't afford to see a Dr. and I REALLY can't afford to be on any sort of medication. 

I ended up making enchiladas and chocolate cake on Friday.  I didn't eat the cake, but I did have a few swipes of the fudge frosting.  I even drank a beer.  Then on Saturday my husband brought home donuts for breakfast and a French silk pie to have with our bbq.  Hot dogs, pasta salad, baked beans, more beer and a big slice of pie.  Sunday (today) I had another two donuts for breakfast.  We went for a long hike in Montana and then went to a local Mexican restaurant to have dinner.  I feel physically ill......like my body has nothing buy garbage in it.  I suppose that's not too far from the truth.  I hate falling off the wagon. 

Come on crossfitcda, I need you to start that Paleo challenge.  I need to have a goal to work towards (like winning $)  and have an accountability partner.  Food has been my friend since grade school and I use it to soothe myself when I'm feeling emotionally sad, unhappy, frustrated, stressed ......you get the idea. 

Tomorrow I'm going to do my best to get back on the horse.  My house is now officially free of junk food and stocked to the gills with fresh produce.  I have got to continue taking steps in the right direction.  Tomorrow I'll be doing my running since crossfit is closed due to the holiday.

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

deep squats

I can totally feel my strength coming back after being ill.  Yay!  It kinda freaked me out on Monday when my muscles literally wouldn't work.  Today's workout at crossfit was great.  It was hard, it's always hard, but I felt really good by the time it was over. 

We did ankle and hip mobility for our warm up.  Whew, very difficult for me to do some of those moves.  Although the cool part was I was actually able to do them, where as two months ago I couldn't.  Literally couldn't.  I can feel my squats are getting a lot deeper.  When I first started my deep squats were more like super shallow ones for everyone else.  My hip mobility was awful.  I'm slowly getting my hips in good working order and am getting stronger so my squats are getting closer and closer to what they should be. 

Our skill set was stepping off a box and landing in a deep squat and then jumping up and high as we could with one strong thrust.  We also did Turkish getups and kettle bell windmills. 

Our WOD was a 10 min. AMRAP.

10 kettle bell power cleans

5 ab rollers

15 wall balls

I actually just looked at our WOD online and realized we were supposed to be doing 15 wall balls and I was only doing 10 per round....OOOPS!  Apparently I wasn't with it when they explained the WOD. 

I finished 5 complete rounds (with my 10 wall balls vs. the 15 we were supposed to do). 


Today is a busy day.  I have 1st grade open house for my daughter and 6th grade open house for my son.  I have a house that needs to be cleaned and picked up.  The 6th grade open house is from 5:30-7:00pm.  So we either eat a super early dinner or a fairly late one.  Ugh!  I should get my crap together and put something in the crockpot so I don't have to scamper and scurry to get dinner out as soon as we get home. 

Tomorrow is another running day.  Woohoo, bring it!

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

sprinting

Today was a running day.  I'm still using the Couch to 5K program and am totally loving it.  So in general you have a warm up, which is brisk walking, then intervals of running and walking followed up by a cool down walk.  Each week you run a bit more and walk a bit less until you are basically running the whole time.  Anyhoo....today on my last interval I decided to sprint.  I'm obviously the most tired by the time I get to the last running interval but I wanted to see what I could do.  Oh My Goodness, it felt like I was going to die!!  I just kept telling myself that it was only a couple minutes and that I can do anything for a couple of minutes.  I did it and it felt great!  Woohoo!!!!!  I go see my sister in 10 weeks.  I'm looking forward to running this 5K with her.  =)  I feel like I'm doing everything in my power to be physically ready. 

I'm going to make that sweet and spicy paleo hash again for lunch like I had yesterday.  I've been dreaming about it all morning.  mmmmmmmm!!! 

Tomorrow is crossfit.  I'm crossing my fingers that I have a bit more energy that I did on Monday. 

Monday, August 26, 2013

Weak Sauce

Went to crossfit this morning and it was awful.  I think having the flu last week really took it's toll.  I had no energy to get through my workout.  Even during the warm up I could feel my leg muscles just stop.  They literally gave out on me.  FUDGE!  The skill set was overhead, back and front squats.  I was using less weight than I did two weeks ago.  Again, it wasn't just hard because it was heavy, it was hard because my body just couldn't seem to get it's crap together and work properly. 

The WOD was

15 overhead squats
100 double unders or if you can't do DU then 30 down and ups

10 OH squats
75 DU/20 down and ups

5 OH squats
50 DU/10 down and ups

I used a super light 20 lb weighted pvc pipe for my overhead squats.  I would've used a 25 lb bar, but they were all taken.  (big class today)

The down and ups killed me.  I actually can't do them properly because of the fat on my stomach getting in the way.  I ended up just doing my modified version of the burpee. 

As I was doing my 1st set of 30 burpees, I started feeling uber nauseous. I took a 15 second breather and got right back down to business.  I lost count somewhere around 20 burpees.  So I did another 5 just to be safe. 

I felt slow, tired, and insanely weak today.  I wanted to stomp my feet on the ground just like a toddler throwing a fit.  It's not fair!!

Anyhoo afterwards I drank my protein shake and came home. 

For lunch I remembered I had some leftover crustless bacon and spinach quiche.  I went to the fridge only to discover that my husband took it to work for his lunch.  Grrrr.....since when does he like paleo food?  Hmmph!

Instead I created a new recipe that rocked my socks off.  It was so insanely yummy!  I wish I hadn't horked it down as soon as it was finished cooking because it was quite pretty with all the colors. 

Sweet and Spicy Paleo Hash

4 strips of bacon cut up in tiny strips
1/2 jalapeno pepper minced
1/4 cup onion
1/2 cup minced cremini  mushrooms  (baby Portobello's)
1/2 cup shredded sweet potato
2 Tbs chopped green onion
2 eggs
1 tsp coconut oil
salt/pepper to taste

I cooked the bacon in a nonstick skillet until crispy.  Next I added the jalapeno, onion, mushrooms and sweet potato and cooked until heated through.  I added a little salt and pepper to the hash and then cooked the eggs.  In a separate nonstick pan I heated the coconut oil and then cooked my eggs over medium.  Once the eggs were cooked, I added them to the top of the hash, sprinkled on the green onions and dug in. 
It was sweet, it was spicy, it was delicious!

This is something I will defninitely make again, but hopefully next time I take a moment to snap a picture before I inhale it.  =)

Thursday, August 22, 2013

feeling lazy

I have not exercised once this week.  I've been battling the flu and just overall not feeling very good.  I can tell my body has been fighting something.  *sigh*  Oh well.  I can't do anything about it.  I'm just going to continue to eat well, drink lots of water, and let my body get better.

I took my daughter to the fair for a few hours yesterday.  Smelling all the food just hurt my stomach.  It made me feel super nauseous.  This is another reason I know I'm not totally well.  Normally I'd be drooling at all the wonderful smells of kettle corn, elephant ears, and corn dogs.  *shudder*  Also seeing the animals and SMELLING the animals just about did me in.  I had to take a break, to drink some water and chew some peppermint gum to keep my tummy happy.  I promised I'd take my daughter since all the boys are at camp.  She's never ever been to the fair and not going just wasn't an option.  I'm super thankful I didn't toss my cookies while out in public. 

Today my mother is taking my daughter and I to go look at granite.  My parents are remodeling their house and she wants my opinion on colors.  I'm looking forward to picking up my husband and sons tomorrow I miss them terribly.  I will continue to rest up for the remainder of this week and hit my running and crossfit hard next week.

I saw that my crossfit is going to have a Fall Paleo Challenge coming up soon.  I'm not sure when it starts, how long it lasts or what the rules are, but I'll be doing it no matter what.  I know the winners can earn some nice cash.  I could use to lose quite a bit of weight and the cash would help pay for, what else, crossfit! 

Monday, August 19, 2013

All alone and not feeling very well

Today I packed up both my boys and my hubby and dropped them off at church camp.  They'll be gone for the remainder of the week.  It's just me and my 6 year old daughter at home.  We've never been able to spend much time alone before, so this should be quite nice.

I haven't felt very good the last couple of days.  Achy, tired, migraines, just feel like poo.  I hope that whatever this is, passes soon.  I don't want it to hinder my workouts or time spent with my daughter. 

I'm signed up to go to crossfit tomorrow, but if I wake up feeling anything like I do today, then I'll have to cancel. 

Time to get the kiddo in the bath and then off to bed early. 

Friday, August 16, 2013

50 burpees.....third time around

Last night was awful.  I barely slept due to a horrible migraine.  I'm allowing the stresses of life get to me and it's dragging me under.  Significant stress always seems to manifest itself into migraines for me.  Ugh!!

I didn't go to crossfit.  I instead took some medication and stayed in bed until it was just a mild headache. 

After I felt better I decided to do what Derek told me to do a few months ago when I couldn't make it into the gym.  50 burpees.   I set my stopwatch and started.  I was able to complete 50 burpees in 6 minutes and 21 seconds.  Now this is the 3rd time I've timed myself doing 50 burpees. 

April 26th ~  I completed 50 burpees in 11 minutes 51 seconds.

May 29th ~ 9 minutes 31 seconds

August 16th ~ 6 minutes 21 seconds

What a huge difference!!  I've almost cut my first time in half.  Woot woot!!    I followed the burpees with 10 minutes of kettle bell exercises.  I'm bummed I couldn't make it in today, but I'm proud of myself for at least doing something. 

My goal for this weekend is just try to let go of the things in my life that I can't control.  My health is more important than stressing over every little thing. 

Have a happy and healthy weekend!

Thursday, August 15, 2013

It's not fun.

Today I got up and sat on the couch, sipping my morning coffee.  I didn't want to go running.  It's not fun.  It's physically painful and it's humiliating to run out in public when I feel so ugly and fat.  The problem is nothing changes when I choose to be lazy. 

I laced up my shoes and went for my second run this week.  I definitely felt more tired and sore today than I did on Monday.  Maybe because on Monday I'd rested a couple days and today was the day after back to back Crossfit sessions.  Whatever the reason, I struggled a bit. 

I'm anxious to really start seeing some changes in my body.  I want to see my pants start getting so loose that I need to go down another size.....same with my shirts.  I know I'm building muscle.  I can feel it in my arms and can tell a huge difference in what I can do at crossfit.  I just feel like the fat is taking it's sweet time to melt away.  I'm sure if I was eating 100% paleo it would speed up the process.  I'm just not sure if I'm willing to do that.  I eat mostly paleo, but definitely not 100%.  I wish this losing weight and getting stronger was an easier process.

I think for lunch I'm going to have a big salad with grilled chicken and bacon, andtonight I'm going to make salmon and steamed broccoli for dinner.  It's all about planning. 

Have a good day!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

More owie shoulders

Today our warm up and skill set was more shoulder exercises.  Ouch ouch ouch!  They were incredibly tender after yesterday's workout. 

Our WOD was a 10 minute AMRAP

10 toes in the hole ( I did 10 ab rollers)

10 box hops

10 down/ups

 I was 3 down/ups away from getting in 5 full rounds.  (4 + 27)


I'm thankful that tomorrow is a running day and I won't have to go to crossfit.  I'm so very tired! 

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Shoulders on fire!

We started off in groups of two for our warm up.  We each did 4 rounds of junkyard dog and bear crawls back and forth across the gym.  I did three rounds before we moved on to the skill sets.  I'm so flipping slow.  ARGG!  So annoying!

Our skill set was approx. 20 minutes of various kettle bell exercises.  This was literally nonstop.  I was a sweaty mess going into the WOD.

The WOD today was 50 pull ups, then run 1/2 mile, then a total of 20 kettle bell movements per arm.  We then ran another 1/2 mile and then did another 20 kettle bell movements per arm. 

I was the slowest person today but I finished.  I didn't take a modified run, I did exactly what was asked of me.  I have no idea what my time was because Meagan thought everyone had finished and she turned off the timer on the wall.  Oh well.  At this point I don't even care what my time was, I just care that I finished. 

During our kettle bell skill set a new gal had to stop, went to the restroom, and then came out and started crying.  She went outside and Jonathan went to go talk w/ her.  I felt bad.  I so know how it feels.  I wanted to pull her aside and talk with her after class, but she was gone by the time I finished my workout.  I hope she doesn't let today get her down.  I don't even know her name.  =(   Next time I see her, I need to make a point to say  hi and tell her I've had many of those experiences myself and that it gets better. 

Today's after workout protein shake consisted of coconut water, protein powder, stevia, and some frozen organic berries.  Delish!!!!  I'm loving the coconut water.  ♥

Monday, August 12, 2013

Let me count the ways......

Crossfit this week will be Tues, Wed, and Friday.  I'll be running today (Monday), Thurs, and Saturday.  I have it written on the calendar.  Yesterday I also made a dinner menu for the week and went to the store to purchase all the needed ingredients.  I will not need to go to the grocery store for the remainder of the week.  This saves me time and also the headache of trying to come up with a plan for dinner at 5:30pm.  I've been so bad at being organized for dinner that my poor family has been eating lots of meals that are a little unconventional.  Anyway, I've been feeling a little guilty and decided that I needed to get my rear in gear and plan it out.  It sounds so easy, why is it so hard to do sometimes?

I've been thinking a lot recently about my past weight loss endeavors.  There have been quite a few!


*STARVATION

I've done this one many times.  I think I started it in middle school.  I got quite good at it when I was about 19 & 20yrs of age and I lost about 70 lbs in 5 months. 



*EXCESSIVE EXERCISE

This one never seemed to do anything.  I figured that if I was going to exercise like a fiend then I would allow myself to eat whatever I wanted.  Of course I'd eat fast food and junk instead of healthy choices that would've filled me up and kept me satisfied.  This weight loss endeavor never ever worked.  I never lost anything more than 5 lbs. 



*BINGING AND PURGING

Looking back now I'm super thankful I was terrible at making myself throw up.  I just could never get the hang of it.  I tried it probably a hundred times throughout the years.  I have been quite a rock star at binging though. 



*LAXATIVES

Ugh, this was the worst!  I used a laxative that caused extreme cramping.  I hated how it made me feel so I soon realized that if I didn't eat at all I wouldn't have to go through the pain.  I tried this method for about a year and lost 25 lbs or so.  Once I stopped taking them and started eating again, the weight came right back.

*CABBAGE SOUP DIET

*CALORIE RESTRICTION

*HCG DIET

*WEIGHT WATCHERS

*LOW CARB DIET

*THE BIGGEST LOSER DIET

*CHRIS POWELL'S CHOOSE TO LOSE DIET

*THE BELLY FAT CURE

*JUICING

*NO SUGAR, FLOUR, OR FAT DIET

Most of these diets, I tried multiple times.  The sad part is, I lost the most weight by just starving myself.  Although I lost a lot of weight, I was still quite flabby.  I'm guessing because I lost a lot of muscle and not a lot of fat.  I was tired all the time, couldn't think straight, had zero zeal for life at all. 

I feel like since I was in 3rd grade, my life has revolved around my weight and what food I put in my mouth.  It's been a battle for 25 years.  I've hated myself for 25 freaking years.  LITERALLY!  I was a failure!  I couldn't lose weight, I couldn't seem to make smart food choices, I was stuck in a rut and felt miserable.  I remember my mother telling me when I was in middle school that boys do not like fat girls and would never ever marry one.  She said I was pretty but had the potential to be beautiful if I could ever lose the weight. 

I hated school because I felt so awkward and different from all the other girls.  No guys paid any attention to me.  No one asked me to prom.  Most of my friends were also chubby and we'd spend the weekends going to movies and eating.  Us fatties had to stick together.

I became a mom who didn't do anything with the kids.  I didn't want to go outside with them, I didn't want to play with them, I just wanted to be left alone.

I fly to Boise once a year to visit my sister.  When I went last summer I couldnt' buckle the seat belt on the plane.  It didn't fit.  I was too humiliated to ask for an extension.  I put the unbuckled belt across my lap and folded my arms over it so you couldn't tell it wasn't latched. 

It literally wasn't  until I was sitting on the couch this past March and started thinking that if I had another chance at starting my life over that I'd be an athlete.  I'd eat like an athlete, work out like an athlete and be around others who were like me. As I was feeling sorry for myself that I couldn't push rewind on my life, it hit me.........
WHO SAYS I CAN'T START BEING WHO I WANT TO BE?

It was like someone slapped me across the face.  It was that day that I emailed Jonathan from CrossFitCDA and asked for help.  My life has never been the same.  I feel different.  I feel......alive.  I feel like there is hope.  I feel proud of who I'm becoming as a person, as a wife and as a mother.  I am so very far from perfect, but I'm starting to like who I am becoming. 

I still have bad days where I'm lazy or I eat junk.  But my good choices are starting to add up and my bad choices are becoming less and less.  Every person who is important in my life have made comments on how they see a different Erica, one they've never seen before.  I can't even tell you how happy that makes me. 

All of this to say that you can do this.  You can pull yourself out of the ruts.  You can change your life for the positive starting today.  Find that one thing you want more than anything and go for it.  Pour yourself into what you want.  You can never regret trying your best, but you will regret never trying.  You are not in this alone.  Find others to help encourage you and go out there and claim your life back!

Friday, August 9, 2013

Went to the Dr. and the Dr. said....

I didn't get much sleep last night, and I woke up at 6:30 am and was wide awake.  I started making a list of all the things that needed to get done today and I soon found myself trying to find ways to get out of going to crossfit.  I told myself to shut up and I went to crossfit instead. 

Yesterday was one of my very favorite workouts.  Today was definitely one of the worst.  No, I didn't cry....I know you were thinking it.

The warm up was done in teams of two.  We had to do 20 meter bear crawls, 20 meter lunges, and 20 meter burpee long jumps.  We did all those things twice.  I was gasping for air by the end of the warm up.  I'd much rather of just ran 400 meters because that was brutal. 

The skill set was working on skull crushers, and hanging from the pull up bar in a "hollow" position and practicing font squat cleans.  I started getting slightly dizzy during the skill sets.  My body just didn't feel like it was cooling itself off very well.  I felt overheated and a little sick to the stomach. 

Our WOD was one I don't ever want to do again.  Haha....seriously. 

We did 90 seconds of burpees as fast as we could, then we had 90 seconds to catch our breath, then 60 seconds of front squat cleans as fast as we could and then we rested another 90 seconds.  Next was 30 seconds of push ups as fast as we could and again rested for 90 seconds.  We then did them all once more.  Derek then told us he had a surprise for each and every one of us since we did so well.  I'm always skeptical when it comes to "surprises".  He told us we had to no another 90 second burpee AMRAP.  Nooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  What a craptastic surprise!  I was dead to the world when it was all over. 

I'm SO SO SO happy that I get a two day weekend to rest and relax.  I have ZERO plans on running this weekend.  Three days of crossfit back to back was enough. 

On another note.........I had to take my son to the Dr. because his ear has been hurting for the past week.  Since it wasn't getting any better I figured it was time to take him in.  I haven't seen our Dr. for about 6 months.  Well the Dr. walked in the room and started asking some questions about my son and his ear when he looked up me.  He all of a sudden stood up and said, "Erica, you look amazing!  How much weight have you lost?".  I told him I wasn't sure since our scale was thrown away, but that I've lost over 30 some odd inches in the last 4 months since starting CrossFit.  He just went on and on about how I looked so radiant and healthy.  I was a bit taken aback.  I don't really feel a whole lot different but apparently I've changed a lot in the last 6 months since he last saw me.  It felt awesome to have someone gush....especially my Dr!  So anyway after he was done bathing me in compliments we got back to why we went there in the first place.  =)

I still have a mountain of things I need to get done today, but had to quickly blog about what happened at the Dr. 

I hope you all have a lovely weekend. 

Thursday, August 8, 2013

sled dragging = best WOD ever!

I went online last night and looked at today's WOD.  It looked so good, I had to go to crossfit today even though I don't normally go on Thursdays.  I've been wanting to try my hand at sled dragging/pulling and haven't been able to make it when they've done it in the past. 

So I've been trying different things for breakfast to see what feels the best when I crossfit.  I'm surprised to say that carbs give me the best endurance through my workouts.  I used to only eat things like eggs, bacon, protein packed things but would constantly feel sick during the WOD's.  I tried cereals, but the small amount of sugars seemed to upset my stomach as well.  I've finally settled on a super small bowl of organic oatmeal.  It's just enough to keep me from getting hungry, I have a nice constant flow of energy during the workouts and I never feel sick.  I bring along a protein shake in a small cooler that I keep in the car and drink on the way home.  Having protein directly after a workout is one of the fastest ways to replenish your muscles.  It also greatly helps decrease soreness that we feel the next day after a grueling workout. 

Anyhoo so today we started off with a 400 meter run.  Instead of trying to stay with the group, I stuck to a comfortable pace and really worked on my breathing and keeping good form.  I was definitely the slowest out of the group, but for the first time I didn't feel like I was gasping for air and going to die.  I felt fairly comfortable.  What a nice change of pace!! 

Our skill set was Romanian Deadlifts.  These really work the back of your legs and your bum.  We did 3 sets of 10.  Ohhh I could definitely feel the burn.  Then we did 3 sets of 10 hip thrusters.  You lay on the ground the place the barbell on your hips.  Then you put your feet on the ground, so your knees are up in the air at about a 90 degree angle.  Then you push up with your hips and clench your bum and lift the barbell off the ground.  This was quick exhausting.  My legs were shaking they were so tired. 

Next we got in groups of 3 and started our WOD.  We used a sled.  It looks similar to this.
 
 
 
We had to pull it down the alley, walking backwards.  Then turn around and drag it back up the alley, walking forwards.  You can definitely feel the different muscle groups it takes to pull it backwards, vs dragging it forwards.  Next we did 20 toes to bar, but for those who aren't able to do those, we'd do 10 ab wheels.  Then 20 wall balls.  We each had to do those three stations, three times.  So basically we did 9 stations in all.  It took our group a total of 25 minutes to complete the WOD.  We were right with the rest of the groups.  It was great to feel like I wasn't slowing my group down. 
 
I loved the sleds.  I've seen them being used on shows like The Biggest Loser and Extreme Weight Loss Edition.  I felt powerful, strong, and accomplished.  They are definitely my new favorite at crossfit. 
 
 
My husband is out of town on business, which means I can get away with super simple, kid friendly meals.  Time to figure out a healthy lunch and dinner before the day gets away from me.