I talked to him like a royal B!

I went to bed super early last night.  7pm to be exact.  I hoped that a ton of sleep would leave me feeling relaxed and refreshed.  Instead I woke up feeling exhausted.  My eyelids were not wanting to cooperate. 

I made it to crossfit this morning.  Huge accomplishment considering how I'm feeling physically and mentally.  Everything we did felt impossibly difficult.  I can tell such a big difference in my endurance and strength when I take a few days off. 

Our warm up was 5 Turkish get ups on each side and then using a slightly heavier bell we did another 3 on each side. 

Our skill set was all about pull ups and negative pull ups.  Jonathan helped me get a super thick band and work on my negative pull ups.  I felt like I was humiliating myself.  I felt weak and it pissed me off!  He told me he could tell how much better I'm getting and I just looked him straight in the eyes and in a sarcastic bitchy way said, "really?!" .  This caused him to stammer a bit and collect himself.  He said that he hadn't seen me in the last 6 weeks because he's been mostly doing evening classes but that he could see a difference in how I look since he last saw me.  At that point he pretty  much excused himself to go help some other people. 

I feel really bad for being a jerk.  I guess I just felt like he was blowing smoke up my rear.  I still feel weak and fat and stupid and lame and and and.......
Maybe he really can tell a difference and I'm just cranky and being a negative nancy. 

Anyhoo our WOD was to get in groups of 4.  Two of us had to drag the sled down and back up the alley and then do 20 meter bear crawl and 10 native jump squats.  We repeated everything twice. 

I'm dead to the world after today's class.  I hope I feel a lot more energy and strength come Friday and maybe I'll get the chance to apologize to Jonathan for being a snarky jerk. 

measurements

I didn't sleep well again last night.  I moved my crossfit workout from 9:30am to noon so I could get some much needed sleep.  I don't like going at noon.   It's super hot and there is no air conditioning in the gym.  Anyhoo, I made it and I did something today I haven't been able to do before.  I was able to hang from the pull up bar.  I know for most people that sounds like a stupid thing to be excited about, but for me this is huge.  I could hang on for 8 or 9 seconds.  I was able to do some of the latt work on the bar.  Basically engaging your lateral muscles and bringing your body up a few inches while hanging on.  I was very happy to see my progress. 

This morning I took my measurements.  I think I mentioned my husband throwing our scale away so I have no idea what I weigh.....and that's ok with me.  I've lost 25 inches off my body since starting crossfit.  4 inchs off each thigh.  woohoo!  My clothes are fitting a bit looser with each passing week.  Nothing astronomical, but a definite difference. 

I feel really good today.  I realized I've been at crossfit now for 4 months.  I've stuck with it!  I haven't quit.  This is probably the longest I've ever stuck to anything.  I'm super happy about that!  I'm making good choices one day at a time.  I can't even wait to see where I'll be a year from now.  I'm slowly peeling away the layers of myself that I can't stand and with each layer I'm finding the person I've always wanted to be.  Someone strong mentally and physically and who pushes forward despite life's bumps in the road.